2009

What we think is logically not approved sometimes by our own mind. then also find reason to follow it. I feel life is a loop we get into same kind of position on same or different places. It is really hard to be consistent sometimes especially for me. Why I am not writing I don't understand because it should flow...

If I see past one year I would say it was a roller coaster ride in neverland ... January made me shiver but it was a happy time though as I find good friends ... this makes me question which state of mind makes u fly ? I feel I trust and in reality I don't do it... in last 12 months I think I have trusted 1or 2 persons. I have felt one strong affection towards life.. By the year end I am feeling I have lived the whole .. nothing left actually .. Mood swings are like weather of Germany now ..It changes any time.. Sometimes I feel alone and it makes me like a rock.. I am loosing emotions day by day and this is making me stubborn and senseless...

Birds are moving back to their nest
Sun down to the western horizon
Shining dot is fading into darkness.
feeling stopped building castles in the sky

I feel homeless in my own self
Scorching myself with inner light
Though it's cooling down
I can't help and it's fading

Tears of my joy has made me shiver now
As much as I see them they make dark days
darkness is not what I fearing for
I am having fear of the hideous sunshine now

Failed to be sad now makes me feel happy
I am happy that's what I would like to say
It's not bitter but still it's not sweet though
Far away from home shining dot is fading

I know love is repulsive for me now
people walked along with me have moved on
I am standing on that same bridge
Which bridged me to myself ...

Realisation

Step by step I reached to the skies
I touched them but I was tied
the presence of mine was
dream of my past

But look at me Standing there
Don't know outcome from where
Passed through though a hell
still not pondering on my deeds

Sins of my bloody hands
Which I cannot wash them away
written as a fate of my splitted mind
the nature is not more kind

And I realised "the time pass my hand which
I had dreamed ones
Is now my present
but because of my deeds of past
I can not cherish the present ."

Blues (Country Music ) A# scale

Thers a blues in the air
like you just wanna dance
Like blues in the air
cause I m in love with you

My feets still celebrates
Beacause I m still in love with you
I wanna dance again
its all what to have about around you

Eyes are watchin you
Movin like a rose petal
Like blues in the air
cause I m in love with you

Suffocated

Ohh ,yeah Again this
Debt of my breath is traped
Torching road which was empty
I am running for the invisible noise

Stunned by the rythem of moan
Stoned by the sins I had done
Plucking my black flower and
yeah I smell it again

I'm in the air for hours
Sliping my knot too far
I had left a Time hand
And ohh I need a breath

seul(once) I see my self

I am standing as again

mirror has realisation again

It gives me a different view

Sometimes laminar and why storm ?

It is confused or my Image

it turns down the page

and forward me to memoirs

Where I was relived and true

It tells me that

I need you encore

realise again

you are mirror

You I and that beautiful night

My heart thunders
beacause it wonders
Its not the fiction
yeah its affection

I jumped on pleanth
where u stood beaneath
I take you in my arm
and yeah i can feel that warmth

My first kiss on ur lips
Like a leaf and a droplet
the shine on ur chics
like u r eyes are playing trics

My heart wonders
and it thunders
beacause yeah it was real
You I and that beautiful night

Waiting

Oh, I belive I am waiting
the world is paused
and I am waiting it to be alive

This dancing droplets
cant wait to diminished
then why am I?

The vibrations from my soul
cant wait to reach out
Then why am I?

My breath from my bones
cant wait to be common
then why am I?

Ohh yes its the same phase
tht I am passing throughit
the void of thougt tht I m feeling now
and yeah I belive I am waiting

the world is paused
and I am waiting it to be alive